I've just seen a face,

And I can't forget the time or place where we just met.
Had it been another day, I might have looked the other way.

I wonder if it's the same for both parties involved.


There's no sun today, for the first time in a while, there is no sun. Generally, I'm not really opposed to clouds, as if you look closely enough you'll see that the world is pigmented with a slight shade of blue. Blue has always been a favourite of mine. But today, I'd hoped there'd be a bit of sun. I have a canvas sitting alone in the corner, begging me for colour, for some life, for a purpose. Were it to be sunny today, I would have managed to escape the prison I've been locked away in. And while it's been a self-admittance, I've made a promise to myself to not stay captive to these four green walls. But alas, for one more day, I will remain inside, while the inspiration I've been looking for is outside, breathing freedom. The same freedom I wish I could just grasp hold of.
I will turn off, and I will shut down. The come and go's are restless in my head.
Alas, I'll pull out the canvas, I will stare at it, and take that restlessness, and convert it, into an image.
An image only I can appreciate the true meaning behind.

♥ b.

But all the while, I've been delivering idiots and photographs, wishing for happiness and disaster.

I won't share you.

I've called to wish you an un-happy birthday.

I've called to wish you an un-happy birthday.

Because you're evil
and you lie
And, if you should die, I might feel slightly sad.
{ but I won't cry }


The Smiths; Morrisey; Lyrical. Genius.





Moving day: September 5th.
School begins: September 9th.

I'm growing more annoyed with the parental units, and 'friends' and the siblings.

The day I get away, it'll surely bring a ray of sun back.


♥b

I hope.

I wonder...

if this is worth my time anymore.

The way I feel right doesn't exactly fit into the 'sunshine and rainbows' category,
yet I give the impression that's where I am.


I need to stop lying, to myself of course, and finally let them know,
that I DO care, I've always cared.


That is al.


♥b

One, Two, Skip a few...

Ninety-Nine, A HUNDRED!

Was I the only kid who used to say that? I hope not.

So, I've started reading Still Alice, which is a book about a woman who gets Alzheimer's. I knew this before I even started reading the book, and it got me to thinking; What if that happens to me? What if I start to forget things that I don't want to forget? What if I can only remember bad things? So, I grabbed my new journal and compiled a list. Well, two lists. The first of things I never want to forget(thus far). And things I'd like to forget, but don't think I ever will.



Dear Becky,
Don't forget these things:

- Losing your two front teeth in the front yard, and getting a two dollar bill.
- Wearing plaid pants, with polka dot shirts.
- Playing Barbies with the boys in the neighbor hood.
- Dressing up in old figure skating outfits, and walking around the neighborhood.
- Being in an Anne of Green Gables look-a-like contest.
- Having hair that went down to your knees.
- Never, not ONCE, breaking a bone.
- Having knee surgery, then thinking you were paralyzed afterward.
- Loving rollerblades.
- Buying your first Comic.
- Having some of the most amazing friends ANYONE could ask for.
- Having one of those friends turn out to something more.
- The day you came home from school, to see your mom with a dog, and finding out it was yours.
- Being daddy's little girl
- Calling your father 'Daddy' longer than you should have.
- Having Curtis as a best friend for the longest time.
- Hiding imaginary animals in the vents on the side of the school.
- Falling in love.
- Your first kiss.
- The first time you rode a bike without training wheels.
- Deciding to stop being so shy.
- Realizing that music means more to you than you once thought.
- That water balloon fight with the whole of the neighborhood.
- Learning to drive.
- Failing your drivers test the first time.
- Graduating high-school.
- Deciding that girls cause too much drama.
- Laughing so hard you cried.


There are more, many more. But for now... that's all I'm going to put up here.



Dear Becky,
Don't remember these things forever:

- Being unhappy.
- Losing Curtis, and what that did to you.
- Having your heart broken.
- Being compared to your sister in most everything.
- How you felt the day your dog died.
- Feeling alone.
- Losing too many people, in a short time frame.

Those are some of the big things, there are little things I want to not remember like, falling on my face at the beach. But for now... that's all.






...Remember that one time we climbed the trees, so we could reach the rainbow?

♥ b.


We weren't tall enough.

Pieces of What?

Doesn't matter anymore.


What's it called when the moon isn't half, but it's less then a quarter? My calender doesn't tell me anymore, and it's throwing me off a little bit. Is it a crescent? I can't remember, but it sure is pretty tonight.

There was an Asian man, and his baby in the park behind my house today. Incase you haven't realized, men with babies are super cute. ASIAN babies are even cuter. The man was just hilarious, he was skipping through the park, having a good ol' time. I laughed, and continued on my way. To be honest, I wasn't really going anywhere, just walking through the living room, sharing my work day experiences with the family.
Really, I'm never really going anywhere. My social life lacks much of anything. Camping soon, with all the people I love <3.
Possibly Halifax in the net weekend with the lovely Colin and Evan :)


I think I like the Jonas Brothers too much for my own good.

When I look to my right, I see the back of my bedroom door.


There are some photos, 3 of these photos make me smile tremendous amounts, each for different reasons.

1. Old Man On Coney Island Pier- This is why: He's got no shoes. He was fishing. He looked at me just when I snapped the picture.
2. Graffiti'd Pole - This is why: It's got asian characters, underneath it says 'Rain In Japanese'.
3. an un-needed reminder.

I find myself looking up there often.


I think I'll go get lost in a fictitious world where tortoises tell the stories, and coma's are comma's.
Yes, this is a world I could get used to.

<3 b.

Pieces of what, I used to call home.

I mean what can I say to you?

So, I read Tinne's Summer List '09. And that girl, is PHENOMENAL. So, I figured, HEY! Why not make one of my own :D
Here goes;
This summer I'd like to

1. Finally beat Ocarina of Time. (Yes, I know... win a game? But I really wanna)
2. Try a food I've never had before.
3. Take more than one trip off Island. I don't care if they're even that far. I just need to leave for a bit.
4. Save my money. Which leads me to
5. FINALLY, send out those christmas gifts, which I've been adding on to since I never send them.
6. Love like I've never loved before.
7. Take more pictures then I've ever taken before.
8. Buy a film Camera.
9. Have the most amazing time with my friends.
10. Try not to miss people as much as I do.
11. Move on.
12. Try to keep drawing as much as I can, which means I should get a sketchbook, and some pencils.
13. Buy more CD's
14. Write a letter. To anyone, or everyone.
15. Invest in some more sunglasses. My collection has been diminishing. I gave some pairs away.


And so far, that's all I can think of. Who knows, as summer goes on I'm sure there will be more things that I plan to as the summer continues.


<3 b.